Tag Archives: crushes

What If…?

Michael Jackson Image credit: thatgrapejuice.net

Michael Jackson
Image credit: thatgrapejuice.net

Do you ever imagine what your life would be like if you had taken a different path?

For example, suppose you had married or settled down with your very first boyfriend or the person who was your very first crush?

Suppose you had done that before letting that first blush pass or allowing the scales to fall from your eyes? Or before you managed to take off those rose-tinted glasses?

But maybe I shouldn’t be so cynical, because I might have actually enjoyed migrating to New Zealand with Phillip K after we got married, and would now be regaling our children with stories about growing up in the tropics.

I know there are a number of people who actually married their high school sweethearts and probably an equal number of them are still together.

But how many of us know for a fact that we dodged a bullet?

I’m not planning on giving away too much information here, but like other young ladies I know, I’ve had my share of crushes. I can’t say that any of them were people on TV, because I’m a practical girl at heart – I want to know that I actually have a chance in hell of hooking up with the man of my dreams.

Not all of us can be as “lucky” as Katie Holmes.

So no. There were no posters of any actors or singers hanging on the walls of the bedroom I shared with my sister. Sure Michael was a looker in his early days, but I can’t say that I ever wanted to marry him.

I know though, that there are some of us who see where our first crushes (or boyfriends) ended up and are glad that first love means there’s a second or even a third to follow.

How many of us know now what we didn’t know then, which is that he really wasn’t marriage material – evidenced by the fact that he is no longer married to the person he decided to marry?

How many of us are relieved that we didn’t have to understand that even though he said he wanted to be married, it didn’t mean that he wouldn’t continue to look for suitable prospects – even after he was married?

How many of us are thankful that we didn’t have to find out that he wasn’t the one for us when he decided that we weren’t the one for him after all – several thousand dollars and a couple hundred wedding favours later?

How many of us are happy that we didn’t have to discover that our significant other was also very significant to others – which could have meant significant weight loss for us?

How many of us are delighted to have avoided owning the title “my baby’s mother” because he was perfectly happy being nothing more than your baby’s daddy – in addition to someone else’s?

Talk about a close call.

What about you? Do you consider your first love the one who got away, or the one you got away from?

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I Heard it through the grapevine

I knew it was going to happen. My son likes … a girl. You know – well you may not know, but he’s ten years old. I know I seem a little flustered, but maybe that’s because I’m a little unprepared.

It was just a few weeks ago that I was surprised at his physical growth, so is it any wonder that I’m a bit behind in considering his emotional development? Regarding girls?

I’ve got to tell you too, that he didn’t inform me of his crush. His father was the one who told me. I’m a little surprised that the frequent hugs and kisses that he bestows on me did not segue way into his little secret.

Boys and their mothers? Apparently, this boy and his mother are not that close.

Although his father has brought me into the loop, I’m still feigning ignorance about the particular girl in question. I played the guessing game and hopped over the names of the girls that I know in his class, and when I got to “the one”, he reneged on his promise to confirm, by saying that he wouldn’t admit it while his sister was in the room.

But his smile gave it away.

I know he’s dying to tell me though. He’s informed me that he thinks girls change as they get older. Apparently when they’re younger (say six), they’re open books, and when they’re older (say ten and up), they play it close to the chest. Or is it hard to get? By not telling anybody (meaning boys) who they really like. Do we actually begin that early?

So I asked if boys are in the habit of saying who they like. And he had to admit that they didn’t either.

So on that score, apparently Mars and Venus are perfectly aligned.